Quranic Relativity

When God Says Ten Different Things About One Verse

Subtitle: How Divine Revelation Turned Into a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Book

Welcome to the wild, unregulated amusement park that is the Qur’an—a book so holy, so pure, so divine that it can’t seem to keep its story straight. One moment it says one thing, the next it says something else, and suddenly, you’re in a theological funhouse with mirrors pointed in every direction. Apologists call it "depth" or "layers." We call it what it is: contradiction on a cosmic scale.

Brace yourself: this isn’t your grandfather’s gentle interfaith dialogue. This is a scorched-earth demolition of one of Islam’s most sacred presumptions—that the Qur’an is internally consistent, perfect, and wholly preserved. That fantasy dies today.

The Myth of Divine Consistency

Islamic tradition asserts that the Qur’an is the perfect, unchanging word of Allah. Muslims are told the book is protected from error (Qur'an 15:9), free of contradiction (Qur'an 4:82), and directly from God Himself (Qur'an 10:37). But let’s not pretend. Behind the curtain of piety lies a mess of conflicting verses, redundant commandments, narrative discontinuities, and theological zig-zags.

Worse, these aren’t differences in interpretation. They’re blatant, undeniable contradictions—often within the same chapter, sometimes even the same verse.

Let’s pull the curtain all the way back.

Abrogation: The Divine Undo Button

First, meet Islam’s favorite bandage: naskh, or abrogation. When confronted with verses that disagree, Islamic scholars invented a magical fix: maybe God just changed His mind.

Qur’an 2:106 cheerfully announces:

"Whatever verse We abrogate or cause to be forgotten, We bring one better than it or similar to it."

So, Allah’s word is perfect... until it isn’t? Welcome to the divine draft-edit loop. This isn’t revelation—this is version control.

The early Muslim community, including heavyweights like Umar and Aisha, openly acknowledged verses that were once part of the Qur’an but were later removed, "forgotten," or overwritten. How convenient.

If God can overwrite Himself, is He really eternal, or is He just a cosmic improviser with commitment issues?

The Wine Paradox: Hellbound Liquor or Heavenly Reward?

Let’s talk about alcohol, the Qur’an’s favorite moral yo-yo. First, alcohol is just fine:

"And from the fruits of date-palms and grapes, you derive intoxicants and good provision." (Qur'an 16:67)

Next, it’s problematic:

"They ask you about wine and gambling. Say, 'In them is great sin and [yet, some] benefit for people.'" (Qur'an 2:219)

Then, it’s banned during prayer:

"Do not approach prayer while you are intoxicated." (Qur'an 4:43)

Finally, it’s outright prohibited:

"Wine, gambling, idols, and divining arrows are abominations of Satan’s handiwork. Avoid them." (Qur'an 5:90)

So, alcohol evolves from divine gift to demonic sin in a few chapters. But wait—in paradise? It’s back!

"They will be given a cup [of wine] whose mixture is of ginger." (Qur'an 76:17) "They will be given to drink pure wine, sealed." (Qur'an 83:25)

Allah bans alcohol in this life only to reward believers with eternal intoxication in the afterlife. Cheers to celestial hypocrisy.

Free Will vs. Predestination: Pick a Side, Any Side

Are humans responsible for their actions, or are we just puppets dangling from Allah’s metaphysical strings? According to the Qur’an, yes. Both.

Humans have free will:

"Whoever wills - let him believe; and whoever wills - let him disbelieve." (Qur'an 18:29)

But wait:

"Allah has sealed their hearts and their hearing, and over their eyes is a veil." (Qur'an 2:7)

Also:

"No disaster strikes except by permission of Allah." (Qur'an 64:11)

So let’s recap. You have the freedom to believe... unless Allah already pre-programmed you to reject Him. Sounds like a cosmic trap more than a test.

How Many Days Did It Take to Create the World?

You’d think an all-knowing deity could count to six without screwing it up. But the Qur’an struggles even with basic math.

Qur'an 7:54, 10:3, and 11:7 all say:

"Indeed, your Lord is Allah, who created the heavens and the earth in six days."

But Qur'an 41:9-12 tells a different story: 2 days for the earth, 4 for nourishment, and 2 more for the heavens. That totals eight.

Muslim apologists somersault through interpretive gymnastics to explain this, often relying on ambiguous Arabic conjunctions. But face it: it’s a contradiction. If you can’t count days without a footnote, maybe don’t claim infallibility.

The Pharaoh's Fate: Drowned or Delivered?

Did Pharaoh drown chasing Moses, or did Allah spare him as a sign?

Qur'an 28:40:

"So We seized him and his soldiers and threw them into the sea."

But Qur'an 10:92 claims:

"So today We will save you in body that you may be a sign for those after you."

Which is it? Dead or preserved? Both?

Muslim commentators try to claim his body was preserved after drowning. That’s not what the text says. If God wanted clarity, He failed spectacularly.

Mary: Sister of Aaron or Mother of Jesus?

Qur'an 19:28:

"O sister of Aaron! Your father was not a man of evil."

Aaron? As in, the brother of Moses? That puts Mary’s timeline about 1,500 years off.

Apologists wave this off as a "title of honor." Yet the Qur’an references Mary’s family lineage repeatedly and never once clarifies the anachronism. For a book that insists on precision, this looks more like sloppy mythological cross-pollination.

The Smoking Earth: When Was the Sky Created?

Qur'an 2:29:

"It is He who created for you all of that which is on the earth. Then He turned to the heaven and made them seven heavens."

But Qur'an 79:27-30 says the heavens came first:

"Are you a more difficult creation or is the heaven? He constructed it... And after that He spread the earth."

The order of operations matters. You can’t have two mutually exclusive creation timelines unless your god is stuck in a time loop. Either the sky came first, or the earth did. Flip-flopping divine chronology doesn’t exactly scream omniscience.

Who Was the First Muslim?

Islam teaches that Muhammad was the final prophet and the first Muslim.

Qur'an 6:14:

"Say [O Muhammad], 'Shall I take as an ally any other than Allah... I have been commanded to be the first [of those who] submit [to Him].'"

But then, Qur'an 2:132 says:

"And this was the legacy that Abraham left to his sons... 'Oh my sons! Allah has chosen for you the [true] religion, so do not die except as Muslims.'"

Also, Qur'an 7:143 says Moses declared:

"I am the first of the believers."

So, Abraham, Moses, and Muhammad all claim to be the first Muslim. Did Allah just forget who signed up first?

The Jesus Confusion: Born of a Virgin or Dust?

The Qur’an states Jesus was born of a virgin (Qur'an 3:47), a unique miracle. Yet it also says:

"The likeness of Jesus is like that of Adam. He created him from dust." (Qur'an 3:59)

If Jesus is just like Adam, then how do you explain his virgin birth being miraculous? Adam didn’t have a mother or father. Jesus had one. So what’s the point of the comparison?

Either Jesus was unique, or he was just another dusty prototype. You can’t have it both ways.

Verdict: Consistency Is for Mortals, Apparently

The Qur’an isn’t internally consistent. It’s a jigsaw puzzle missing corners, contradicting itself across ethics, law, history, and theology. What’s passed off as "divine complexity" is often just narrative sloppiness and revisionist backpedaling.

Muslims are told this book is from the "Lord of the Worlds," but if any human authored a document this incoherent, they’d be fired by chapter two. No editor, theologian, or honest skeptic should give this mess a free pass.

And yet, to question it is heresy. To ask for clarity is rebellion. To seek consistency is blasphemy.

Too bad. We’re not here to soothe myths. We’re here to shatter them.

Disclaimer This post critiques Islam as an ideology, doctrine, and historical system—not Muslims as individuals. Every human deserves respect; beliefs do not.

Sources and Citations:

1. The Qur’an: Surahs 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 16, 18, 19, 28, 41, 64, 76, 79, 83

2. Ibn Kathir, Tafsir Ibn Kathir, Dar-us-Salam Publications.

3. Al-Tabari, Jami al-Bayan, 9th Century Tafsir.

4. Sahih al-Bukhari, various hadith referencing abrogation, preserved bodies, and contradictory reports.

5. Patricia Crone & Michael Cook, Hagarism: The Making of the Islamic World

6. Gabriel Said Reynolds, The Qur’an and the Bible: Text and Commentary